i'm coming out of a haze, if you will. it's like i'm seeing and breathing again, and i'm floored that somehow i hadn't realized i had even stopped in the first place.
i've been bogged down lately by trying to do God's will. of course, it's good to want to do what God desires of us and to follow his will, but not the way i was going about it. in my desire to know everything, to understand every detail of his will for my life, i became trapped by the fear of not fulfilling it. i was so blindsided and distracted with the minute that it left no room for me to see his grand, ultimate purpose for me. i lost what it meant to know that God is sovereign and that he loves me in truly unfathomable ways.
let me just say, His Word is so incredibly powerful.
As Jesus and his disciples were on their way, he came to a village where a woman named Martha opened her home to him. She had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord's feet listening to what he said. But Martha was distracted by all the preparations that had to be made. She came to him and asked, 'Lord, don't you care that my sister has left me to do the work by myself? Tell her to help me!'
'Martha, Martha,' the Lord answered, 'you are worried and upset about many things, but only one thing is needed. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her."
you might as well have called me Martha for the past few weeks. i've been doing the same thing she did--losing sight of God and his ultimate desire for me even while i'm staring him in the face and talking with him. wowzers. in the end, all that matters is that i'm at the Lord's feet listening, fully captured and caught up in who He is.
inhale...exhale. that image...i can feel it filling up my soul...